You're tied together with a smile, but you're coming undone.

To you, these things might seem like flaws. To me, these things taught me life lessons.

I'm vertically challenged. I still have to ask people to get things down from the top shelf for me. Being short has helped my climbing skills though, and having to climb to get to things a lot helped me get over a fear of heights. I've fallen many times from failed attempts, but it's taught me to get right back up on my feet again and move on.

I'm extremely emotional. A lot of people stay away from me because they think feeling so much means I have a lot of drama in my life. I don't. If anything, I've learned how to keep my emotions in check, and to not let them cause problems in my life. Sometimes I still hold it in long enough that it goes over capacity, and I can't keep myself together, but that's rare. I'm one of the most emotional people I know, but I just know how to hide it better than others.

I've got big hands, for a girl. When I was younger, I hated my hands. And any hands in general. I think they're just as ugly as feet. I especially hated how I didn't have cute little girly hands like everyone else. But I think the reason I don't is because it makes it easier for me to balance many things at once. Weak little girlish hands couldn't handle most of the things I deal with every day, and would not be able to hold as many people up as I do.

I get attached to people easily. This has made me rush into a lot of things that I shouldn't have in the past. But I always learn from it. Plus, it just means I care about people a lot. I see the good in people that most others don't, and I'm drawn to that. It's not a personal need for someone to be there, it's a desire to want to be there for them.

I have a problem with food. I'm pretty sure I have a weird eating disorder. I have trouble eating around other people most of the time, and I guarantee most of you haven't seen me eat. Sometimes when I'm alone I binge on junk food. And even when I feel like I'm starving, I'll take a few bites and not be hungry anymore. I don't do it because of body issues, and I have never purged. I don't know what you'd call it really. Sometimes I go a day or two without eating, and can feel perfectly okay. I'm still trying to figure out the silver lining to this flaw...

I have trouble letting go. There's a lot of things that I have finally moved on from that happened in the past. But I can't even tell you how long it took to finally get over those things. Because I get so attached, it's hard for me to let go of things. It takes months, even years for some things. But being able to hold on through all the bad times... sometimes that's a good thing. It means I'm willing to fight for what I want, and most people just give up so easily these days. That's why there's so many divorces; people give up so easily at the first sign of trouble, rather than working through it. If I ever get married, I will refuse to ever get a divorce, no matter how bad things might get. "You can't see the rainbow if you don't go through the rain."

I'm honest to a fault. I think lying is a waste of time, because life is too short to waste on people you don't enjoy being around and places you don't enjoy spending time at. Why bother lying? If you don't like someone, don't act like you do. If you're going to say something behind their back, make sure it's something you aren't afraid to say to their face. With that said, I try to keep my mouth shut about things that will cause drama. So anything I may say bad about someone without them knowing, is always something I would tell them in person, if they have the balls to ask me. I'm not going to lie and say I didn't say something if I did. I don't say things I don't mean, and I don't waste my time on people that I don't care for. Sometimes that comes off kind of mean, but would you rather me pretend to be your friend when I'm not? I didn't think so. If you ask my opinion, chances are I probably won't sugarcoat it. You asked for honesty, and if you can't handle the truth you shouldn't ask me for it when you know I'll be really up-front about it. Honesty is a good trait to have.

I'm very straightforward about my feelings. I've only truly been in love once, but that doesn't mean I haven't loved many different people. Loving someone and being in love with someone are totally different things, and I've definitely loved a lot of people. I fall for guys, sure, and care about them enough to know that I love them, but that doesn't require me to be in love with them. I'm in love with love. And if I like you, I'm going to tell you. I don't like to waste time. I'd rather know right then and there if you feel the same way, because if you don't, then I'll get over it and move on. It's that simple. Some people hate this about me because they don't like how direct I am, but it just helps me weed out the people I do and don't want in my life.

I have crazy mood swings for no reason at all. Probably one of my worst qualities. But I know that anyone who can handle my chaos of emotions is someone who I want to stick around. My closest friends know how to snap me out of my moods, and that's why I love them.

I know I have plenty of imperfections. I could go on for days like this, but I won't because you get the idea. My biggest weaknesses are also my biggest strengths. I truly believe that. And if you think about it, you'll realize yours are too.

Maybe I'm just too old-fashioned.

I don't understand how people can jump into relationship after relationship so easily or so quickly. I can count on one hand the number of actual boyfriends I have had since freshman year of high school. Most people I know can't even count them all on TWO hands. Why? Why is it sooo important to constantly have a boyfriend/girlfriend? I just don't get it. Like, I understand not wanting to be alone. Makes sense. Everybody wants to feel loved, and like they matter to someone. But hopping from one person to the next so quickly..? Most of the people I'm talking about are the ones who date someone for a few weeks, maybe a couple months, and then break up only to be dating someone else after a couple weeks or sometimes less. Yet during the last relationship you were telling each other "I love you"..? Yeah. I'm so sure. If you were so "in love" you would've tried harder to stay together in the first place, and you wouldn't have moved on to the next person already.

There's this thing called having time to yourself too. Maybe you haven't heard of it, so I'll explain. You can't really know who you are if you're always in a relationship, because then you're trying to be what that person wants rather than being yourself. You may THINK you're being yourself, but if you're always with a different person, how do you know? Sometimes you've gotta take some time away from relationships and just stay single for a while. It's good for you, I promise. You can't love someone else until you learn to love yourself first. And you should never let a boyfriend/girlfriend define you. By going from one immediately to the next, that's essentially what you're doing. And my guess would be because you most likely are too afraid to be yourself in fear of people realizing they don't like the real you, that you date so many people to try to hide behind whatever mask you put on for each person you date.

When you have such short relationships with so many different people, you aren't really even learning anything. The whole point of a relationship is to grow and experience new things. If you're only with someone for a month or so, that's hardly enough time to get to know each other, let alone experience all the different things in a relationship that makes it worthwhile. So why bother making anything "official" every time you start talking to someone new? Get to know each other first, then build a relationship from that. Isn't that how it's supposed to work? There's nothing wrong with getting to know a few different people at the same time before going into an actual relationship, you know. That's part of the whole process. If you limit yourself to one person at a time and never stay single, you're basically losing opportunities to meet other people who could potentially be better matches for you than the one person you settled for. I'm just saying it because it's true. There's no fun in constantly being caught up in a relationship and never getting to know other options.

Looking at my relationship history, you could say I almost always have a guy around. But how many of them were actual boyfriends? And by that, I don't mean boys that I was sort of dating for a week or so. I mean actual boyfriends. FOUR. Sure, I tend to almost always be "talking" to someone, but honestly? I don't ONLY talk to them necessarily, and I don't let the fact that we're talking keep me from socializing with other guys either. And so far that method hasn't failed me. If we end up "talking" for close to a month, it ends up turning into a relationship. If it's less than that, usually the guy isn't worth my time, or it's because he blows me off. I will say that there was only one of those boyfriends that I didn't really talk to until we started dating, and that relationship lasted for a year and a half. But he was my first love, so that makes an exception to the rule. The other guys? We talked for about a month before officially being in a relationship. I got to know them before making a decision about whether or not I wanted to be with them, rather than saying, "Hey I like you, and you like me, we should date!" By getting to know them first I was able to make an INFORMED decision. Two of those relationships lasted for a full year (one was off and on a lot though, but that was freshman year so I was pretty young still) and the third only lasted for a total of two months (he had the personality of a sheet of paper, and I was his first girlfriend so he was really awkward about it). See? It's really not a bad approach. c;

Maybe I am just far too old-fashioned, thinking that a girl should be courted before you ask her to be official. Or maybe I'm just too difficult, being really picky about who becomes an actual boyfriend. I tend to let my guard down and fall really easily, and honestly I probably shouldn't since I almost always end up hurt. I don't know. But I feel like anything else I continue to say will just be redundant now, so I'll just summarize again really fast. Takes some time off between relationships to spend time alone and with friends. Don't settle for just anyone because you'll miss out on getting to know other people. And if you're going to date someone, get to know them before rushing into things, that way you'll know after a while of talking if the feelings are real or not. There's billions of people in this world, you know. You're allowed to be picky. c: